There's a faith that's practiced somewhere in Asia ( I can't remember where exactly) where people are asked to leave their shoes so that someone else may walk in them for a while. This is such a wonderful thing to do. To understand even a little about someone's life we need to get ourselves out of the way. It's so important to offer feedback and not advice.
We all want to be understood and have our own needs met. When we let ourselves be open and really listen we can truly understand what someone else is saying. How many of us have met people who say "I know what you need, you need to do........." almost before we've even said what the issue is?
Many of us have the urge to to be right or seen as someone with a lot of knowledge but all the knowledge in the world is worth nothing if we don't have empathy. When we listen EFT truly comes from the heart.
The first thing a client wants to know is that the therapist can help them with their problem. Not how much knowledge the therapist has, how big their client list is or whether they've used EFT on the Prime Minister - these are of far less importance to the client.
Whatever the client believes they are right. We are their mirror and we need to be as good a mirror we can by offering feedback. Then they can transform before their own eyes. They don't want to have our reflection behind them in them. Would you want to see someone else's reflection in your own mirror? Imagine someone telling you how you should brush your teeth each time.
Sunday 8 March 2009
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